Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Sugar Coated Life


I wish someone would be wearing orange shirt or bring some oranges to the office today so I could have a valid reason to slam someone’s head into the wall. If I were caught red handed while slamming this person’s head I’d just say that I feel hostile after seeing the colour orange.

Since I really am bored to death and tired of making some mind maps just to understand my life situation, I decided to come up with some trivia about myself.

Trivia 1.

I hate knives

Not a lot of people know that I am not good in using sharp objects. Not only because my parents never let me used them when I was growing up but also because I had a very traumatic experience when I was in the boarding school.

It was a very fine Sunday morning and I at that time was listening to the countdown on my Walkman with a good friend of mine when I suddenly heard something. “ I just can’t take it anymore! I don’t want to live! Why did you leave me?”. Indeed it sounded like a normal TV script you might say since I am watching some stupid soap while typing this. I just can’t think of a better line so I just copied whatever it is on telly. Anyway, back to the story. My friend and I saw that one of our dorm mates was holding a knife and trying hard to slit her wrist. My friend whom I shall name as W (real identity won’t be revealed since it’d be the end of me if she happens to find out about this) screamed as loud as she could while I was still trying to understand why in the world would she used a vegetable knife to slit her wrist and how long would it takes to slit her wrist using that knife.

W and I tried to persuade her to put the knife down. I was a bit proud of myself at the time after realizing that hours spent on watching the Hong Kong Police Story mini series had finally paid off. She was somewhat reluctant and started to wave her hands around. Next thing I knew W took a bottle of mineral water and splashed it to her. I really should have stabbed W instead since I fell because of the slippery floor. W, you should feel lucky that I didn’t do so. It wasn’t a successful attempt since the girl had grabbed W’s hands instead. The last things that I remembered were that I had slapped her up and punch her head and left some nasty bruises that remained for a week.

We found out later on that her boyfriend died in a car accident some weeks before and she just couldn’t handle it. Moral of the story: vegetable knife is a deadly weapon.

Trivia 2

I can’t use matches.

I almost burnt my house down when I was six because I burnt some papers on the kitchen floor; some of the papers flew and fell on the kitchen top and I jumped with joy because I managed to light the match. It burnt some plastic in the process and Dad smelt the smoke. He took the water hose and tried to stop it from spreading. Dad took out his cane and voila a few marks were left on my palms and butts for my little experiment with matches on the kitchen floor. That was the first and the last time that I ever had that sort of punishment. Thank God!

Trivia 3

My parents almost reported me as a missing person

It was a very important mission for me. It was to win the biggest hamper in the Family Day of my housing area. And the event was the cross-country, but in this case it would be crossing the housing area. My family was cheering up for me when I was at the starting line. I was waving to them with my miss world’s wave when I suddenly heard Dad screamed to me, “start to run for god sake “ when I realized that everybody else was already running like some mad cows in Britain. Not that we had any mad cows disease at that time of my life.

I somehow managed to catch up with the leading group and when I passed by the first post the guy who was guarding it who happened to be my neighbour radioed my Dad and told him that I had passed through him. Suddenly it occurred to me that wouldn’t it be nice if I just go home, grab something to bite and take a nap right after that. I tried to find the way to go home and the thought of winning the hamper was replaced with the thought of having a refreshing home made air bandung . Out of nowhere I saw my neighbour who lived next to my house was riding his bike and I asked him to give me a lift. He was somewhat reluctant since I was still in the race. I told him that it was nature’s call and I definitely had to answer it because I don’t want to get any bladder infections and I was still young and I still need to use my bladder for a very long time compared to him.

After 3 minutes of hard labour to convince him, I managed to get a lift and it was jolly good to find that my granny had made me my favourite air bandung. Muahhahahaaa! I did what I planned earlier on and had one of the best naps ever. I went back to the event by hitching a ride on someone’s bicycle and Mum came to me after seeing me happily chatting with the winner of the big hamper at the closing ceremony.

She told me that the family got worried after knowing that all the participants had finished the race but me. A few hours after that while they almost made a police report that I was missing during the cross country event, my neighbour went back to the event and told them that I was safe and sound at home.

Till today, I never finish any cross-country event that I participated during my school years.

High - James Blunt

Beautiful dawn - lights up the shore for me.
There is nothing else in the world,
I'd rather wake up and see with you.

Beautiful dawn - I'm just chasing time again.
Thought I would die a lonely man, in endless night.
But now I'm high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me.

Beautiful dawn - melt with the stars again.
Do you remember the day when my journey began?
Will you remember the end of time?

Beautiful dawn - You're just blowing my mind again.
Thought I was born to endless night, until you shine.
High; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me.

Will you be my shoulder when I'm grey and older?
Promise me tomorrow starts with you,
Getting high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Mondayitis

I shall apologies to those who keep refreshing my blog for the past few weeks to see whether I have updated my blog. Thanks to TMNET technicians who took about a month to settle the line problem, I now could blog again at 7am onwards since my geeky housemate have to download amazing race 9 every night. Sheesh!

One thing that I really sure that I couldn’t do in my life as a human or 7 lives if I happened to be cursed to be a cat is to play politics. The politics in the office is really devastating at the moment that I myself can’t understand the situation that I’m in. At first the management decided not to continue with my contract, then when I got another opportunity they finally made up their mind. They played silly buggers, which made me stressed the whole week! Anyhow, until today I am not certain what really is happening. It sort of like being in a sick cycle carousel and you are on the verge of throwing up but you can’t because you are afraid of heights and you can’t move your body at all and you had to stop yourself from thinking about throwing up by thinking about how good it is to have a cup of hot chocolate instead.

As a consequence of this post-traumatic stress disorder from the not so encouraging situation, I ended up making some terrible in-jokes with the intention of pulling someone legs. But for now I think I wouldn’t touch something with a ten-foot pole. I suppose I need to study the Monty Python before I start making jokes again.

I would be in a black mood every time I heard the song by Ne-Yo - So Sick. God I am so sick of your song! Somebody please kill the song!

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