Friday, May 27, 2005

A Review on life

This Would Make A Great I/C Pic Posted by Hello
I’m walking on sunshine! Yeah right…

Yes! It’s been a very lazy day. Maybe, it’s because of the weather. Or maybe because I am still tired from yesterday’s outing. I walked quite a mile with Jaja to meet up with KCL who totally forgotten to bring the books he was supposed to lend me. Luckily, my anger had been washed away with free luncheons on him
Been sleeping and watching VCD’s the whole day. But then I had to watch “Daun di atas bantal” half way since I had to spend 20minutes talking with this person who was worried over nothing sigh. I managed to watch “Biola tak berdawai” without any intrusions. Yeay! A sad movie and shall be watched with 100% concentration or you would miss out Nicholas’s.

Stupidity produces antibody

I was on my way home with Al-Jazera from our outing in Times Square. In my calculation, it was safe for us both to cross the street when all of a sudden a kenari suddenly went into the same road that we were crossing. The driver didn’t even bother to signal and it looked as if he was about to go straight. When we had safely crossed the road, we turned our back to see the driver and guess what? He slowed down his car and gave us a stare. What the @#%&?

My Fave Companion

He’s back! yeay! As usual, banters while having dinner. Who on earth would ever say no to that? What a night.

I almost choked to dead when I heard him saying on the phone that it’d be great to have me as his sister since I am so ‘terajangable’. I would jump from KL Tower if I happened to have him as my brother. Yikes!

My Fave Someone

I am still worry about him. And for no apparent reasons.

Will be away for a couple of days, to attend my neighbor’s wedding. I don’t really anticipate the whole idea of me attending the wedding. But since her house is next to mine, it is obligatory for me to attend it. By hook or by crook! Besides, mom already bought me a new baju kurung to be worn. Darn! I have no more excuses for not going.
**This would be my first short posting. Maybe you guys could help me celebrating it by sending me some canned food since I’m running low with my ration**
"At Your Side"
When the daylight's gone and you're on your own
And you need a friend just to be around
I will comfort you, I will take your hand
And I'll pull you through, I will understand
And you know thatI'll be at your side, there's no need to worry
Together we'll survive through the haste and hurry
I'll be at your side
If you feel like you're alone, and you've nowhere to turn
I'll be at your sideIf life's standing still and your soul's confused
And you cannot find what road to choose
If you make mistakes (make mistakes)
You can't let me down (let me down)
I will still believe (still believe)
I will turn around
And you know thatI'll be at your side, there's no need to worry
Together we'll survive through the haste and hurry
I'll be at your sideIf you feel like you're alone, and you've nowhere to turn
I'll be at your side
I'll be at your side
I'll be at your side
You know that
I'll be at your side, there's no need to worry
Together we'll survive through the haste and hurry
I'll be at your sideIf you feel like you're alone, you've got somewhere to go,'
Cos I'm right thereI'll be at your side,
I'll be right there for you(Together we'll survive) through the haste and hurry
I'll be at your sideIf you feel like you're alone, you've got somewhere to go,
'Cos I'm at your sideI'll be right there for youI'll be right there for you,
yeahI'm right at your side

Friday, May 20, 2005

Drowning Lessons

Guess which one i fancy more? The bird or the model? Posted by Hello
What is your value?

Something hit me today. I felt like I’ve always been left out from any social gathering due to my financial crisis. I believed that my value has decreased tremendously since the past six months. Only time will tell whether my value among my circle of friends will increase once I have a new job. Crazy as it sounds but that’s the truth. I wonder if my value could be estimated in RM how much will it be?
Truth hurts!Ouch!

How are you doing?

I’ve been wondering about my fave someone. Is he doing fine? Does he need anything? Does he want to talk? His mum passed away for a moth now. Still, I am worried about him.

Six months after he left

It’s been six months since abah passed away. Nothing much changed; only chaos and things keep going wrong.

Things that I miss the most about Abah

1) The smell of his cigarette
Yeap. I do miss the smell. One could tell that abah was at home just by the smell. Once,he tried to give up smoking after he had the stroke. But after a month we knew that he’d back to the old habit. He used to hide his cigarettes amid mom’s plants and mom would purposely water the plants so the cigarette would get wet.

2) Having meal together
I always had my meal together with him. The last meal that I had with him was on the first day of hari raya. We had some ketupat that he made for the very last time. At first he was reluctant to do it. But then I insisted on him. I really had no idea that it would be the very last time I had his ketupat. If I’d known it earlier, I’d most probably eat it all by myself and put on more weight.

3) Gossiping about mom
We always gossiped about mum in English. Sometimes she could sense that we were talking about her and she’d definitely defended herself. At times it’d end up in arguments but most of the time we all had a great laugh.

4) Radio
After abah passed away, no body ever listened to the radio that I bought for him. He used to have this small radio that he bought from the night market for RM10. The sound from the radio was really annoying. It sounded like some Martians were trying to make contact with the earthlings. So I decided to buy him a decent radio for his listening pleasure and placed it next to his lazy chair. He’d listen to the oldies and dozed off on his chair most of the afternoons. Mum would then turn off the radio and that would wake him up.

5) Talk turkey
Whenever I drove the car, we’d always have these special chats about things. We never had these conversations anywhere else but the car. We talked about things, from my well being to politic issues.

Long Vacation

The long weekends would mean nothing to me. I’ve been doing the laundry (yes, I do my own laundry at home. And yes, I don’t have a washing machine, Tq) the whole day. I moved the TV and the hi-fi around. Voila! I have a new look in my room.
I think I’m going to use the time alone at home to rejuvenate. Well, I have to use the word rejuvenate since I’ve been having a vacation all this while.LOL.

My Chemical Romance-Helena
Long ago
Just like the hearse you died to get in again
We are so far from you
Burning on just like a match you start to incinerate
The lives of everyone you knew
And whats the worst to take, from every heart you break (heart you break)
And like a blade you stake
Well I've been holding on tonight
Whats the worst that I could say? Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight So long and goodnight
Came a time
When every star fall brought you to tears again
We are the very hurt you sold
And whats the worst you take, from every heart you break
And like a blade you stake
Well I've been holding on tonight
Whats the worst that I could say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight So long and goodnight
And if you carry on this way
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight So long and goodnight
Can you hear me? Are you near me?
Do we deserve to leave the earth?
Do we learn
When both our cars collide?
Whats the worst that I could say?
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight So long and goodnight
And if you carry on this way
Things are better if I stay
So long and goodnight So long and goodnight

Thursday, May 19, 2005

one hell of a day

sit back and relax Posted by Hello
I went for an interview, which ended up being two instead of one. Both have their own stories, which I found rather exciting and amusing.

Reality check
I was early for my first time ever, by half an hour. I was so proud of myself and almost broke down and cried LOL. The interviewer at the recruitment agency was a very friendly lady. She was so bold and full of confidents. We talked a lot about so many things. At one point, I felt as if she had forgotten that she was supposed to interview me.
Before I left for my next interview, she even told me that she likes me a lot and hope to meet me again. I guess she’s another lonely lady that needs to go out more and find herself a really good companions. Seriously, she is a very sweet lady. You know, like the fairy godmother that can make your wish comes true. She even confessed that she could work lots of magic so I’d be able to get a job in a blink of the eye. Hmmm.
She also reminded me that as a normal looker, I had to work hard to climb my way up the corporate ladder. Should I punch her nose for the blunt remark? Hahaha.
I almost banged my head onto the walls when I heard she said this: I think your tooth is a bit of distraction. Perhaps, it would be best if you don’t smile that wide. Argh! What the !@#$ was she talking about?. For those of you who know how I look like, you will realize that I’ve this tooth that grew outside the line, which is known as ‘gigi taring’. The first thing that crossed my mind at that time was this: Oh gosh! I could’ve been charge for sexual misconduct every time I smile at my colleagues. Yikes!
All in all, she had taught me something new, not only about my tooth but also the body languages that I need to work on. I shall put this interview under the fun but scary encounter with truth.

Sell yourself short

I went for my second interview in Bukit Bintang. To be honest, I was not prepared for the interview. Not only because I was still having a post trauma from my interview with that lady but also I didn’t have the time to do my research.

The interviewer was not as fun and scary like the first one. I had to wait for almost an hour before I got to see her. She was more professional and straight to the point. I was babbling all the while about media sales and almost fainted when I heard she said: you have some points there. I shall arrange for your second interview in a few days.
*Sigh* I want this job badly! I could have running amok in the office and make her give me the job there and there.

It would be very convenient if I got to work there. Maybe I can continue with my SK class, which I left 7 months ago. Guess all the other guys have got their yellow belt :-)

What’s your job again?

An acquaintance sent me a link for a vacancy as a blogger. In 10 years time we would hear lots of new job titles that we would have never imagine before. I told a few acquaintances about the job and all of them thought that I was joking. Duh!
I thought it’d be fun to work as a blogger. It’d feel like you are not working at all. Well, it’d feel like I’m not working at all since I am now blogging almost daily.Hahaha!
It’d be cool though. Just imagine how amuse your peers will be when they heard that you work as a blogger. Some of them wouldn’t realize that their jaws are hung opened and some flies have laid their eggs inside.
Happy teacher’s day
Gebob and Kojeh always have this special day that they shared with abah. This year is the very first year that they didn’t get to celebrate with him. They used to compete who got the best present from their student. Gebob always won since she is the type of teacher that students like the most.

When I was little I went to the same school as Abah. I didn’t like it when he taught my class as a replacement. I never got to answer his questions since he wanted to avoid being accused for favoritism. So I had to sulk at the back of the class and praying hard that the class would end soon.

I tried not to think of it but then I remembered that I never had the chance to wish him happy teacher’s day. One by one, I realized all the things that I took for granted. And this is certainly one of it. Abah, Happy Teacher’s Day!
This would be my new fave. Cool VC. Like it a lot
Feel Good Inc.
Learn forever hand in hand
Windmill, Windmill for the land.
My dreams,
they've got to kiss,
because I dont get sleep, no..
And all I wanna hear is the message beep.
A melancholy town where we never smile.
You've got a new horizon
It's ephermal style.
You wont get out the county, 'cos you're bad and free
So all you fill the streets it’s appealing to see
They just have to go 'cos they dont know whack.
City's breaking down on a camel’s back.
Take it all in on your stride
It is sticking, falling down
Love forever love is free
Let’s turn forever you and me
Windmill, windmill for the land
Is everybody in?
Laughing gas these hazmats, fast cats,
Lining them up-a like ass cracks,
Ladies, homies, at the trackits my chocolate attack.
Shit, I'm stepping in the heart of this here
Care bear bumping in the heart of this herewatch me as I gravitate hahahahahahaa.
Yo, we gonna go ghost town,this motown,
with yo soundyou're in the place
you gonna bite the dust
Cant fight with usWith yo sound
you kill the dont stop, get it, get it
until you're cheddar header.
Yo, watch the way I navigate
Windmill, Windmill for the land.
Learn forever hand in hand
Take it all in on your strideIt is sticking, falling down
Love forever love is freeLet’s turn forever you and me
Windmill, windmill for the land
Is everybody in?
Dont stop, get it, get it
we are your captains in itsteady,watch me navigate,ahahahahahhaa.
Dont stop, get it, get it
we are your captains in itsteady, watch me navigate

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

I love Karipap

This is how I look like when I wake up in the morning Posted by Hello

I met up with a friend whom I haven’t met for quite sometimes. In fact, today was the first time ever that I went out to KLCC by using the public transportation. It was awkward because I suddenly realized how I missed my reading in the LRT’s.
The movie was not bad. But then I still feel like throwing up after seeing all the blood splashing here and there. Luckily I had my meal before the movie, or else I might lose my appetite. All in all, it was a great day. I cherished the companion of an old friend and marveled at the new one.
Got A Problem?
I’ve been reading other people’s blog, which I found interesting and amusing. It’s interesting to learn that most people on earth have one thing in common: they always have problems. The amusing part would be what it takes to make people hack your blog and let it appears blank for a few hours.
A problem is a very subjective matter. To some people, financial would be their biggest problem, ie yours truly who is now having almost zero income. Not only we look at problems differently but also on how to solve it. I have a few options in hand but the only obstacle would be insufficient encouragement received. :lol:

My fave companion talked to me other day. He said I was too lazy to move my butt. As always I launched a shrill attack on him. Alas, prove is needed to support my statement. So far, I have none.

Thing that irritate me the most

I had supper with peanut last night at our fave place. The place was quite full and we had to sit in the inner part. After a while, one of the tables on the outer part was vacant and I made my move to change our table. I was talking on the phone and as I was about to sit came this guy and pulled the chair. He made a rude gesture, asking me to leave the table. What the !@#$? I was there first and still he dared to do so. Since I always frequent that place, I decided not to make a scene. How I wish I had a saber so I could knock his empty head (he might have a good look but I swear that he has lost his brain somewhere along the way) and the other two girls who thought that they were with Brad Pitt. Oh god!Please! He was an even far cry from M Daud Kilau.

Frame of mind
Not in a very good mood.

Jobless and sober!
I went out 4 days in a row, which meant I’ve spent a good deal of money though I saved some by having free breakfast at FINAS and free dinner sponsored by my fave someone.
*Sigh* My job hunting is still no avail and I’m getting sick and tired.

Sunny Sunday

I went out with my fave someone last Sunday. We went to CM and PS, which I haven’t been to for quite sometime. I stepped out of the shop while he sent in his pics to be developed. Something nostalgic struck me at that time when I heard Sheila On 7’s song ‘Dan’ playing from the music store next door. It felt as if walking a memory lane. I went to CM with Macca once and never after that we came back to hang out at that place. It felt odd for going back to the same place after a few years at first but then when I heard the song, I was certain that I should let him go for good.
Bila esok datang kembali
Seperti sedia kala dimana kau bisa bercanda
Perlahan kaupun, lupakan aku
Mimpi burukmu
Dimana t'lah kutancapkan duri tajam
Kaupun menangis, menangis sedih
Maafkan aku...
Bukan maksudku, bukan inginku
Melukaimu sadarkah kau di sini 'kupun terluka
Melupakanmu, menepikanmu
Maafkan aku
Lupakanlah/caci maki saja diriku
Bila itu bisa membuatmu kembali bersinar
Dan berpijar seperti dulu kala
In darkness he is all I see
The outing was great; I had satay with the companion that I valued the most. (I really am sorry for leaving u at the stall all alone. I had to go into 7E to get some cool air or else I might have fainted there and there. You wouldn’t want that won’t you?)I never knew that there is a good satay stall in PS. Thank you for introducing me to it ;-) Will you buy me dinner at Chinoz next time?

Stop gibbering, man, and tell us what movie you have did.
I was a bit indolent that very morning but still I went over to FINAS last Sunday. Karipap Rawkz! That is all I could say about the free breakfast. I almost fell asleep due to over consuming of karipap :-p. guys, please avoid the ever so yummy karipap if you go to FINAS’s movie appreciation. You’d fall asleep and miss all the fun hehe. The long awaited debate between Yasmin Ahmad and Mansor Puteh finally took place. But it was a bit mellow and not as fierce as all of us had expected it to be. I could only came out with these two points :
1) Sepet is a telemovie
Well, I partly agree with this one. But not all movies made in Malaysia are telemovies except by the you-know-who. I would burn the house of those who said that Sepet is just another tele-movie.
2) Sepet is a soft porn movie
Yikes! This is scary. Maybe they had orgies while watching Sepet in the cinema. I wonder…
Our beloved Mansor Puteh said that he’d certainly wins an award in Cannes if he makes a movie that reveals a lot of the Malay’s breasts. He also bragged that he have seen everything in the anatomy of a woman since he lives in New York. Well, I believe we don’t need to go as far as him to learn about the anatomy. All these things can be seen, in our own backyard boys and girls.One will only need to stroll along Bukit Bintang and some of the other places to see it all.
IMHO, a good movie is a good movie. No need to scrutinize all the superfluous details. We are the moviegoers that can think and filter what’s good and what’s bad. As Pak Hasan Mutalib said on that day, we are the kind of moviegoers that have been awaited for in 30 years. Yeay!I could never be so proud of myself on that day. At least I know all the money that had been used to watch all the movies in cinema did contribute to making an impact to the film industry. Not forget to mention my contribution to the VCD sellers might have helped them to get more money to buy lots of original DVDs so we can have more film selections.I am as eager as a beaver to watch his movie. That’s the only thing I could say since I’m trying my best not to curse him in public..hehehe
Love Signs and You
I had a real laugh tonight with my newly found friend. I was reading this book, which titled “Love Signs and You” and I told him about his star. We laughed hard since none of the things said in the book about him was right. I now have doubt over this book upon knowing that we both had none of the characteristics said in the book. hehehe..
It is said in the book that as a Sagittarian from that particular year, I shall fell in the inspired suitor category. “You shall be a very satisfying lover, visionary, dreamy and romantic. You tend to put your partner on a pedestal and idealize their word and action. No wonder so many want to be your one-and-only!” YEAH RIGHT!I should send in an email to the writer and tell her that she had wrongly read the tarot card and her book shall be burned by all the readers.

Lavatory is the place to be

life in a lavatory Posted by Hello

I started writing this posting a couple of weeks ago. Due to some tragic events, extra curricular activities and visiting my family, I had to keep this aside. As I seems to have all the time to kill I can continue with my writing.

What I learned from a movie

I had my weekly dose of watching a good movie last night. It was harrowing. Like others, those kids haunted me. A few scenes really moved my feelings. Still I felt mostly moved when they planted all the plants in the noodle cups. The plants symbolized their hope, which kept them going. That’s something that I could really relate to. Another thing is I’m slowly changing my diet to instant noodles lately, so I definitely could relate to that. .LOL. I’ve been hoping for good things to happen to me. Lately, the only things that keep me going are my hope. Insyaallah, good things will happen, eventually. The other all of a sudden I felt bored living my life. I happened to tell my fave companion about this. When he asked me why, it seemed like I didn’t have a perfect answer for that.
I heard a remark from a friend of mine about how strong and calm I am. I guess no matter how hard my life is at the moment; I still need to go on with my life. In that movie, though their mom left them to seek for her own happiness, still they struggle to stay alive. I believe if she saw that movie, she’d feel the same like I do.
Lately, being able to see my friends to only have some drinks could bring me so much happiness. But to some people, they can’t understand why should I still feel happy living my life. These children had felt the utmost happiness when they played at the playground. It doesn’t matter how hard your live is, you still deserves the right to be happy. I don’t believe in hiding inside my room and blaming every human that walks the earth for the catastrophe that I have to face. That would be selfish
Like Yuki who didn’t get to do many things while she was alive, I also didn’t get to do some things in the past. Yuki didn’t get to see her mother though she kept telling her siblings that she had a hunch that their mother would come back for her birthday. I didn’t get to say good-bye to my dad though I was actually had the chance to do so. But I believe that if I happened to call him up that very night, his soft voice would haunt me for the rest of my life.
Shigeru definitely reminds me of Angah. Silly but kind. It was funny when he sniffed the noodles through the small opening while waiting for it to be ready. Yeap, waiting for the noodle to be ready can really test your patience.
When Akira put Yuki in the luggage and he slipped the red slippers on her tiny feet, it reminded me of abah’s sandal that I gave out to Emi. It was really sad to see they put all the things that she loved the most in the luggage; the red slippers, the Apollo chocos. Then Akira and Saki took the luggage to the airport to bury her there because she always wanted to see the planes. If I could ever bury all the bad memories that I have just like that wouldn’t it be easier to be me?

The 9th anniversary that I’d never get to celebrate

It was the first time ever that I didn’t celebrate my 9th anniversary with Macca. Though I took the liberty to sms him and wished him anniversary, till today I never heard anything from him. It was a very sad and lonely day. How I wished at that time that I could delete the day out of the calendar and replace it my birthday instead.

Why I love Anuar Zain

I will always have good memories on Anuar Zain, who has mellifluous voice. Not only because he was supposed to be my birthday present from my fave companion (but then he had to replace it with something else since Anuar Zain was out of town*sigh*) but also because most of the people that I love likes him too.
I had my karaoke session with my fave someone on our way back to our hometown a couple of weeks ago. I just realized that the cassette had spoilt when out of a sudden Anuar Zain’s voice sounded like a mice. Well, at first I was terrified since it was very late at night and the highway was deserted. How relieved I was when I realized that it was the spoilt cassette rather than some entity trying to have fun with us. My fave someone always plays this cassette whenever I ride in his car. Perhaps it’s about time for me to buy him a new one.
Angah and Kak Chik had dubbed Anuar Zain as their good friend. Am I to blame? Nah! I don’t think so..LOL.. They have been complaining about his latest video clip. They just can’t wait to see the continuation of it. To tell you the truth, I think Anuar Zain looks great as a samurai.Yummy!hehe

Post-traumatic stress disorder
My fave someone has just lost his beloved mother. Five months after I lost my beloved abah. It felt as if I had to go through it all again, but this time through other people’s eyes.
I believe it’s easier for us both to talk to each other. How good it was for me to be able to be by his side when he had to go through this.
I always pray that he’ll be just fine and only time will tell how he’s going to face the fact that his mother won’t be there when he gets home next time.

recevoir une leçon dure mais profitable ( to be sadder but wiser)

I went back to see my family twice in 3 weeks. Each time I go back, I feel a different feeling. When I went back together with my fave someone when his mother had the stroke attack, I felt sad when I arrived at the front gate. Not only because his mother was in the hospital and hadn’t gained her consciousness but also because I missed my dad out of a sudden.
The second time was different. I felt like he was still here. It felt as if he would sleep on his lazy chair and waited for me to be home. I almost called out abah instead of mak when I knocked the front door. How I miss him opening the door for me


Gebob is going to have her second child, at last. Though she still refuses to talk to us, Kojeh and I are glad that her wish has been granted. We never know when she’d learn her lessons on life. One could only pray
Mom is fine. She had given me the opportunity to do some gardening with her the other day. I had to tend my fave someone’s plants that is under my mom’s care. When she had a very good eyesight, she never let me come anywhere near her plants. She was afraid that I might break her vases or any other accidents that might occur during the gardening session.
Tuk Wan as always wants some TLC. He likes to make me jumpy especially late at night. I know deep down in his heart he finds it funny to see me terrified when he suddenly opens up his eyes ala Tru Calling’ dead bodies. I suppose he laughs after I tuck him to bed every nigh

Les liens de l'amitié (the ties of friendship)

Friends come and go. Long lost friends could be found anywhere, even when you are in the lavatory. I met my two long lost friends, one from my secondary school years and the other from my college years.
It’s hard actually. When you have not seen the other person for ten years, it would be awkward to suddenly see them reappearing in your life. Though I have taken her phone number on the day we met, I still don’t have the guts to sms her at least.
I feel bless with all the friends that I’ve since I was little to those that I just meet recently. I just can’t thank those new found friends who have been lending their ears and listening to my nagging. LoL
Thank you people for including me in your circle of friends and hopefully it will last. Cheers!

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

In Between Dreams

i wish a butterfly would lepak on my nose someday ;-) Posted by Hello

Haven’t update for quite sometimes.

Been busy..Well not that I am busy with my life whatsoever..Been busy taking care of other people..That’s more like it..


I had a conversation with a fellow blogger who I came to know through the blog that I frequent lately. He said that the blog should be written sincerely because it is what comes from the heart. It is special since it is personal. I strongly agree with his advice. Thank you so much for reminding me why I started writing my blog in the first place.Sometimes it’s hard for you to tell people what you really feel at certain time. In fact I believe that I could communicate better in writing rather than telling that person verbally about my feelings n such.I had experienced something funny this week. As I didn’t pay up my rental fees for two months, it seemed like I’ve pissed my housemate off big time. We both don’t talk much ever since I moved in with her. As a result, she sent me a memo, which she left on TV one night. I was awestruck at first but then it became a humor.

Most of my friends laughed heartily when they heard that she also mentioned about the broom, among other things. I had a very good idea about writing a short movie script based on this situation. It would make a very good comedy I guess. Perhaps, I should produce a short movie on “How to live with a weird housemate”.She thought that by putting the newspaper under the mat would be effective in telling me that I was supposed to sweep the floor. Peanut and I thought that she forgot to remove the newspaper and I took the liberty to remove it the very next day. LOL. Anyway, I spent a vast amount of time writing her a letter to explain the whole situation that I’m facing at the moment. It took her about two days to stop sending me letters since she had be replying my letter every time.

Not many people understand how could I live with her since we rarely speak to each other. I have my own life and she doesn’t seem to have any. Well at least I do have friends to hang out with, screenings to attend, and books to read. We don’t have anything in common except for the Internet. She loves Backstreet Boys, which I think is so uncool. She likes American Idol and The Amazing Race so much that she had printed out the stickers of the contestants and did her own wallpapers for these 2 TV series. I thought I am a weirdo but to some extent she is weirder than I am. She can be mean at times but as always I’d just ignore it.hahaha. Maybe she feels like she has the right to decapitate me and display my head in front of 7-11 every time I ignore her memo.In the mean time, I’d just live with her and try to tolerate her weirdness no matter how weird it is. With a bit of luck!

Count your blessings

I called my mom a last week and she as always argues on why I am still stuck with the part time job at the production house rather than asking how am I doing lately. I then told her that my table fan is broke and I can’t afford to buy a new one. Mom as always made some remark about the situation and detested the idea of buying a new one for her beloved daughter. Well, knowing her really well I knew that I needed to buy the fan on my own.

All of a sudden I felt like a damsel in distress. But to my surprise she bought me a new fan and passed it over to Peanut who came over last week. Gosh! Where is my real mom? Somebody, please give me back my mom! Though it was only a small table fan, still I felt blessed or else I might die of heat in my tiny room.

Someone said to me that I’ve been acting strange due to my over consuming of instant noodle. But then he had to shut his mouth when I came out with this remarkable remark. Well at least I thought it was remarkable since he refused to speak to me for a few days. He was telling me that he had sushi (upon hearing he had sushi, I was drooling like nobody’s business..hahah) and kfc etc while I only had instant noodles for the past few days ( he didn’t know that I actually had Maggie once last week and it was because I was too lazy to go out). So I said to him, I don’t bother much about the food as long as I’m grateful about it. Then I asked him, do you recite your do’a before you eat your meal because it won’t mean nothing if u don’t. So count your blessings.

Enjoy your meal and be grateful that you are blessed with good food while others may have to eat something that they dug out from the bins.

Change of heart

I believe that when abah passed away, everybody has changed in certain ways. Mom is a bit relaxed, compared to the first two months after abah died. Kojeh too is more concerned about my well-being. She has nag less and less lately. I still haven’t spoke to Gebob though Kojeh told me that she has started to visit mom again. Good for mom since she misses Gebob lately.

Variety is the spice of life

For the past few weeks, some of my friends have given their suggestions on how I could make my life better. Some of the suggestions given are quite fascinating on paper but I’m not that keen to do it practically. This very special someone had even suggested me moving out from the house and moved in with his friend. I can’t afford to do so at this phase of my life and the other significant reason is I don’t want to have any conflict of interest. Based on the telephone conversation that I had with this person I knew that I had make the right decision and my very first impression about that girl was right. Hmmmm.

Another friend of mine said that it’d be best if I worked at the diner that we frequent together. For god sake! 1) That diner only hires men 2) I know she wants me to match her with the waiter and I certainly don’t want to be in any part of it *sigh*

Kojeh also suggested that I go back home and live with mom. The idea seemed to be alluring at first but then it occurred to me that I moved to Kl because I wanted to be independent. I never regret the decision that I made before though there is somebody trying to make feel the other way around.

My fave companion

He sms-ed me a few days ago. As always he asked me about my life. I happened to tell him that I’m tired living my life. He asked me back why did I say so. But by then I was already asleep and didn’t answer his question until today. Perhaps I need to have a long conversation with him in order for me to really answer his question.

"Sitting, Waiting, Wishing"

Now I was sitting waiting wishing

That you believed in superstitions

Then maybe you'd see the signs

But Lord knows that this world is cruel

And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool

Learning loving somebody don't make them love you

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?

Must I always be playing playing the fool?

I sing ya songs I dance a danceI gave ya friends all a chance

Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you

And maybe you been through this before

But its my first time

So please ignore

The next few lines cause they're directed at you

I cant always be waiting waiting on you

I cant always be playing playing your fool

I keep playing your cards

But its not my scene

Wont this plot not twist?I've had enough mystery.

Keep building me up, then shooting me down

Well im already down

Just wait a minute

Just sitting waiting

Just wait a minute

Just sitting waiting

Well if I was in your position

Id put down all my ammunition

I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long

But Lord knows that I'm not you

And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel

Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?

Must I always be playing playing the fool?

No I cant always be waiting waiting on you

I cant always be playing playing your fool, foool