Saturday, July 30, 2005

Weird World of Mine

Pile on the agony

It’s been a long week. I came back late from work and went straight to bed. I totally had forgotten about my blog. So many things happened, too many sadness and grief. A few hearts are broken and a lot more in despair.

I had a very terrible week I should say. I went to work feeling cranky the whole week and luckily nobody got hurt out of this, though I had showed the finger to quite a few people. I am so thankful that I am still alive up to this day.

My heart has been crumbled and tossed all over this week. I wish I could’ve iron my heart to make all the wrinkles gone. It would be better if I could send my heart to dry cleaning, alas I’m broke and sending my heart to the dry cleaning is definitely a big no, no!

To the faithful departed

For some lovers in love, their love is not meant to last. To see these two people that I care about went their own separate ways, makes me feel like my heart has been tossed into the ditch. You know, like how you tossed the counseling report that you had to sign up though you had debated your reasons for being 5 minutes late for hours with your superior.

When I called him this afternoon, I just couldn’t believe my ear (I’ve started to question myself about my ability to hear well after having to listen to all the curses and pranks from the callers on daily basis) is it true? How are you coping? We paused in between, just to listen to his breath; heavy and slow. It was a torment to hear him that way. You can’t imagine how hurt it is to having to listen to him while he talked on how worry he is about her. It was even more depressing to hear him said I love you more to me before I hung up the phone.
I wish everything would turn out fine.


I talked to mum the other day. It all went well until out of a sudden she started to cry. She wished that I came back to live with her. But I don’t think that I could stay in the house. I always think about abah lately. It would be sad to see mum sleeping alone in her bed. I can’t be sleeping on my bed where his cold body was laid. It’s too agonizing just to think of it.

His birthday will be on in about 3 weeks. There won’t be any celebration or gifts to be sent home. I remember it very well. Two weeks after abah passed away, I went inside a shop to find some shirts for abah. I already chose the shirts that I wanted to buy for him when I was hit by reality. Abah is here no more and there’s nobody else that I could buy the shirts for.

I miss his cooking, very dearly. I miss his ketupat even more. But what I miss the most is the chat that we had every week without failed. When I called to check on the recipe, he’d argued with mum about the ingredients and the methods. It was funny to hear their banters. I guess that’s why mum feels so lonely without his wits.

When I went out with Gebob and Kojeh, we talked about how we all competed to give him the best gift. Mum would feel jealous when she saw all the gifts that we bought for his birthday. They both teased each other about who got the best gift ever. He never worn the last gift that I gave him, and most of the things that I bought were never been used. I bought him a few kain pelikat but he never worn them. I found them stacked neatly in his wardrobe, still in the wrappers. Mum asked me to take them back but I refused. Let it be stacked in there, as a sign of his past existence, which will always be missed.

I wish that I would have totally forgotten that 19th of August is just around the corner.

Are you crying?

I spoke to a dear friend the other night. She too, had a dreadful week. If I had wings, I would have took her under them (this would be after I put on a lot of deodorant) and protect her from all harms. I’d put away her misery by flapping my wings (which most probably need to be sprayed with febreeze after a few flap) and fly her to the highest mountain to leave all the anguish behind and let her have her peace.

Beforehand, I SMS-ed her about how I felt towards those people that have been hurting her feelings. She called me up after receiving my SMS. We talked about how mean these people are towards her when tears started to stream down my cheeks. The tears streamed down faster after I heard she said, “ Are you crying?”

I felt really angry and sad at that very moment because people can’t stop hurting other’s feelings though they barely know much about the person. I felt ashamed to know that respect and courtesy would one day become very alien ideas to us. I wish I could tell all these people who she really is, what she really means to most of us and how she has inspires us lot.

People can be so mean to each other. I suppose I don’t need to elaborate more on this. We know how people are. Alas, there’s nothing much that we could do about that. We can’t really protect our privacy lately, thanks to the thing called Internet. We can do as we wish, say things as we want to.

It's true what people say
God protect the ones who help themselves
in their own way
And I often wondered to myself:
Who protects the ones who can't protect themselves?

Cranberries-"Fee Fi Fo"

Weep buckets
I must confess that I could easily cry lately. Maybe I am getting fragile. Perhaps, I am getting older. Excuse me; I need to have a look in the mirror, just to check any signs of white hair.

"Be Yourself"
Someone falls to pieces
Sleepin all alone
Someone kills the pain
Spinning in the silence
To finally drift away
Someone gets excited
In a chapel yard
Catches a bouquet
Another lays a dozen
White roses on a grave
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
Someone finds salvation in everyone
And another only pain
Someone tries to hide himself
Down inside himself he prays
Someone swears his true love
Untill the end of time
Another runs away
Separate or united?
Healthy or insane?
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
And even when you've paid enough,
been pulled apart or been held up
With every single memory of the good
or bad faces of luck
don't lose any sleep tonight
I'm sure everything will end up alright
You may win or lose
But to be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do

Thursday, July 21, 2005

The complete idiot's guides to: calling help line

This is exactly how the freshies look like on their first day at the call center
Since I’ve started working at call center, which is Rafferty's rules I realized one thing; People don’t have any ideas on how to make a phone call to the help line. In the end, they will feel frustrated for not getting the answers needed from the Customer Service Executives (CSE) of the Telco. So I shall write down all the things that deemed necessary in order for you as the customer to get the best customer service ever (literally).

1) Pen and a piece of paper
Before you dial the help line, please make sure that you have these two things. The CSE will definitely say that he wouldn’t mind waiting for you to find the pen and paper while listening to you screaming at your kids to pass them to you. But one thing that you don’t know is that he is actually jotting down your number and planning to write them up the public phone booth and advertise you as an Along.

2) Location
Do not call help line while watching TV or listening to the radio. The static will annoys the CSE since their headphone really is sensitive. You will then be instructed to go out of the house and scream your lungs out since the CSE claimed that he couldn’t hear you well. You would end up looking like a lunatic talking on the phone in the compound. This is a very good way for the CSE to embarrass you with the whole neighborhood as a revenge for the static.

3) Voice
Make sure that you speak with a very pleasant voice. Remember, the CSE doesn’t see your face. If you just woke up with only your kain pelikat and suddenly decided to recharge your phone’s credit ASAP, please make sure that you sound upbeat. Or else the CSE might come out with a very rude remark about how hoarse you sound since he is jealous that you could wake up at 1pm on Sunday morning whereas he have to start working at 7am.

Girls, make sure that you don’t sound like a transvestite on the phone. There’s no reason on why you should speak so soft like an Ah Kua. The CSE especially the girls will press the mute button and curse you like hell while asking you to repeat things over and over again until you got fed up and drop the line.

4) Details
Remember the details on any accounts. If you sound like a lost kid in the mall to the CSE you will suddenly realize that the soft spoken and understanding CSE suddenly sounds like his hemorrhoid is going to burst out.

Ensure that you understand when, how and why really means or you’d feel like you want to throw yourself out of the windows from the 30th floor for not getting the answers to your questions.

5) Prank call
If you decided to make a prank or silent call to the help line, please do not use your own phone. This is the most important rule especially if you want to play the sounds of people making up while you talk dirty to the CSE. Don’t be surprised if suddenly people keep calling you up and ask if you are available for a one-night stand every hour even while you are having a meeting with your potential girlfriend.

The worst thing could happen? Imagine that your car tyre is punctured in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night and your spare tyre is bald and you need to call for help. Suddenly you realize that your line has been barred and the only no that you could call is the TELCO help line. We won’t want that to happen, won’t we?

6) Names and numbers
Please make sure that you give your real name unless you intended to make a prank call.
If the CSE knows that you keep calling to check the balance credit of your girlfriend with different names daily, you will most probably get a very cold treatment or you wont get to check her balance at all.Remember your phone nos too. CSEs' can smell your lie miles away!

P/S: I’m going to write up about why I don’t want to entertain calls to check for balance for third party. The main reason is that I feel like there’s no trust in them. But that’s going to be posted in another posting J

7) Language

Do not, I repeat DO NOT SPEAK IN SLANGS, especially if you faking it. You don’t know whom are you dealing with.

8) Patience is the best policy
If you just activate any services, there’s no need for you t o be panic if after 5minutes the service has been not activated yet. You need to at least give 4hours for the service to be activated. It won’t speed up the process even if you call the help line every 30 minutes to check whether your service has been activated yet.

9) I no stupid
Case study 1:

Caller: I’d like to know how to listen to my ring tones. I’ve been trying but to no avail.
CSE: Miss, do you want to activate your ring tones?
Caller: **Indecisive** errrr…I suppose so..
CSE: Miss, you just need to (instructions given)
Caller: **perplexed** what’s that?
CSE: You haven’t activated the service. No wonder you can’t listen to any ring tones.
(Please read in a very irritated tones)

Case study 2:

Caller: I can’t make any outgoing phone calls from my phone. It’s a brand new phone for god sake! I just bought it last week! What the %^&* is going on?
CSE: Sir, there’s nothing wrong with either your phone or our service. It’s just that you have RM0.00 in your balance credit. Logically, you can’t make any outgoing phone calls except to the help line (please read this line in a very sarcastic tone)
Caller: oooh!(sheepishly drop the line)

10) Understand all these guidelines and know it by heart!

This is how a heart breaks
Just learned that two people that I love dearly have broke up.

My fave someone
He’s been very busy. We have many catching ups to do.

from Kahlil Gibran on Friendship

Your friend is one who answers to your needs:
the field you sow with love, and reap with thanks;
you seek him for your peace, to hear his heart;
and when he's silent - still his heart you hear: because, with words or not, you share his joy;
in presence or in absence he is there;
and stronger love may in his absence show: the beauty of a love that asks for naught.
So tell your friend of all that ebbs and flows,
your best and worst of what fate deals to you: no thought too great nor light for open minds
who share their pleasures, and their laughter too.
For in the dew of sweet and passing thoughts each morning's fresh, for close and constant hearts.
Michael Shepherd

Monday, July 18, 2005

Murid-murid SKYM

Fact of the day:Mute's dimples could hold 1cent coins.

Nazrul and Mute looked so happy because they had been elected as the President and Vice President of Persatuan Alam dan Manusia SKYM.Both of them had bribed the whole school with ever so popular Mute's SKYM.

Megat stared at Gemok who was hiding his book under the table.Megat was in fact tried to find a way to steal Gemok's book to copy the answers for Maths homework.What Megat didn't know was that Gemok actually copied the answers from Jason who copied from Adam who copied from Ted who copied from Leman budak darjah 5 Purple who was standing at the back!

Cikgu Visitor was demonstrating the art of eating nasi goreng without having to open up your mouth which he had mastered for 40 years to Hazera and Pengki.

Hazera was so impressed while Pengki posed for the camera.

From Left to Right:

If you wonder why Nazrul looked like that, well he just had his ubat cacing before lunch.After lunch all the worms were waiting to come out.
Pengetua Sekolah,Cikgu Yasmin.Just by looking at her one would knows what does Kenyang Perut Suka Hati means :)
Ketua Kelas 5Pink,Habri who was trying his best to maintain his balooning tummy
Jaja,the member of Tunas Puteri who always so eager to camp around the school compound.

Gemok looked so distressed because he was afraid that he didn't enough money to pay for his meal.He forgot to asked for his school allowance from his mom earlier.He was actually counting for the 11th times.

Ah Tat pretended not to see Gemok counting his money.Alas he was ensuring that he could pau Gemok to pay for his lunch too.

Syahrulfikri was so happy because his mom would come to pick him up after school.He always lost his way back from school since he was in Darjah 1 Hijau.

This is Ah Tat.He had to wear the cap because his mom made him used ubat kutu which was given by Misi Halimah.

Credits to Hazera for all the pics.TQ SO STRONG!

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Two postings in one day!

I might seem like a very hardworking blogger by writing two postings in a day. Or like Emi would have said: Gigih ya amat! I have to write this posting since I don’t want to lose the hype by delaying it.

It all started with a phone call from my fave someone who reminded me to watch the new reality show on tv3. Well, you guys have guessed it. Mencari Cinta (Searching for Love).I just realized that my fave someone was not aware that I my hi-fi could play the vcd’s.So I abruptly stopped watching the VCD and tuned in to TV3.

The program started by showing all the contestants doing their favourite past time and some interviews with their family and friends. I suppose the contestants must have a great headache before the shooting. What to wear? What to say? How to rehearse my family and friends so they look so natural when they talk about how great I am? I wonder if there was any family feud that happened because of this show. Their family members and friends must have argued on whom should be on TV. Those that were on the show must have done lots of sucking up hahahaha..

During the show, both my fave someone and I exchanged our comments using the SMS. I supposed it was best that we didn’t watch the show together or someone might have got killed by then.

After wasting my precious hour watching the show, these are the things that I could sum out:
1) Men can be fussier than women
One contestant said that he has 42 criteria’s that he wants a woman to have. He must have watched Stepford Wives far too many.

2) They can’t seem to compromise any flaws in a woman
Should they blame women for not falling in love them? Nope, they shouldn’t. It seems like they will only make room for a perfect girl. Shame on you guys J

3) All of them are bad actors
The part that I hate the most? When they got into the room and all of them tried to look impressed with the room’s d├ęcor. I bet kak chik could’ve acted better than they did. They tried so hard to make them look like an average Joe. It’s such a pity to see them that way.

If I were to be the ‘lucky girl’ in the show, I reckon they would have withdraw themselves out of the show on the spot like my fave someone said to me. LOL.
All in all, it would be fun to watch these guys strategize on how to win the girl’s heart.

So here’s to the contestants, a moving poet by Khalil Gibran. Cheers!

Song of Love XXIV

I am the lover's eyes, and the spirit's Wine,
and the heart's nourishment.
I am a rose. My heart opens at dawn and
The virgin kisses me and places me
Upon her breast.
I am the house of true fortune,
and the Origin of pleasure,
and the beginning Of peace and tranquility.
I am the gentle
Smile upon his lips of beauty.
When youth
Overtakes me he forgets his toil, and his
Whole life becomes reality of sweet dreams.
I am the poet's elation,
And the artist's revelation,
And the musician's inspiration.
I am a sacred shrine in the heart of a Child,
adored by a merciful mother.
I appear to a heart's cry; I shun a demand;
My fullness pursues the heart's desire;
It shuns the empty claim of the voice.
I appeared to Adam through Eve
And exile was his lot;
Yet I revealed myself to Solomon,
and He drew wisdom from my presence.
I smiled at Helena and she destroyed Tarwada;
Yet I crowned Cleopatra and peace dominated
The Valley of the Nile.
I am like the ages -- building today
And destroying tomorrow;
I am like a god, who creates and ruins;
I am sweeter than a violet's sigh;
I am more violent than a raging tempest.
Gifts alone do not entice me;
Parting does not discourage me;
Poverty does not chase me;
Jealousy does not prove my awareness;
Madness does not evidence my presence.
Oh seekers,
I am Truth,
beseeching Truth;
And your Truth in seeking and receiving
And protecting me shall determine my
Khalil Gibran

Saturday, July 09, 2005

~It's raining men~

Give Me Strength

This is my prayer to thee, my lord---strike,
strike at the root of penury in my heart.
Give me the strength lightly to bear my joys and sorrows.
Give me the strength to make my love fruitful in service.
Give me the strength never to disown the poor or bend my knees before insolent might.
Give me the strength to raise my mind high above daily trifles.
And give me the strength to surrender my strength to thy will with love.

Rabindranath Tagore

It’s raining cats and dogs outside. I never felt so blissful to hear the heavy rain drops today. I suppose it’s because I couldn’t hear the raindrops at the office nor I couldn’t feel the wind blowing through my windows. It would be so refreshing to run outside and play in the rain. Lately, I could see the lightning strikes from my office but I could not hear the sounds of it. It makes me feel lonely and sad. It reminds me how I am so blessed with the ability to hear and to see. I thank God for all the blessings that I have taken for granted all these years.

Ass-sessments !

I was at the office last Saturday, to reseat for my call-answering assessment. I did well I supposed since I was already been given the schedule for next week. I was still dizzy due to lack of sleep and I didn’t have a proper lunch today. I was not in the mood to eat by myself, so I ended up having bread, again.

I had two sessions with two different seniors. The first one was very warm and supportive. She gave me all the freedoms that I wanted and needed to toggle with the system. The best thing was I got some rooms to make mistakes and I learnt my lessons well. Came the second senior, I felt as if I should ran amok in the office and killed anybody who wears blue shirt. I believe that anywhere in the world, in any companies, schools or colleges, there’d be somebody who wants us to hail them as Miss-Knows-It -All. I wonder if she purposely interrupted my phone conversation with a customer right in front of my trainer just to show how incompetent I am. sigh

Luckily, I passed the assessment but I reckon not with flying colours!

Know when you are well off

I believe that I have wasted the 1st half of this year and accomplished nothing. I was jobless, then hired. I worked for 3 months with no pay. I went back to square one for a few months. And now we are already in the second half of 2005. What have I gained out of these messes? A lot. Have I any regrets? A few but it’s nothing compared to all the lessons that I learnt from the hardships that I had to endure. All in all, I grow I each and every way; from the small plants in nobody knows to the big trees in LOTR. Well not that big yet, but I suppose I’d be that big if I follow the doc’s instruction to eat 5 meals daily to maintain my blood pressure LOL.

Khayalan Tingkat Tinggi

I had a strange urge to listen to that song last night.
Khayalan Tingkat Tinggi - Peter Pan
awal ku melihat
kuyakin ini bukanlah yang biasa
melemahkan aku melihat tatap matanya
garis tawanya
waktu berhenti apabila
ku memandangnya
melemahkan aku melihat tatap matanya
khayalan ini setinggi-tingginya
tepat ku memikirkannya
bila ku dapat ku simpan wajahnya
memegang indahnya
berpura memilikinya
yang kunanti saat memegang tangannya
sampai nanti tetap memegang tangannya

Why do I love this song so much? It’s plain to see the reasons from the lyrics. I’ve been longing for something for so long that I’ve started to question myself is it really worth it to holding on something that I know for certain would never be mine? I believe I shall get the answer eventually. In the mean time, this song shall be my anthem and I’ll sing it with gusto everyday as I wake up from my sleep.

I can't believe there's anything seriously wrong with her - she's the picture of health.

If I were pretty enough, I would have been chosen as the National Health model. You know, like Siti Nurhaliza who had been chosen as the PBSM ambassador. I always in good health and I donate blood twice a year. Come to think of it, I would get the opportunities to do covers for magazines. I could be the next top health model. I could be on the cover with Fahrin Ahmad!Heck! I need to shed off some fat before that. Hmmm what diet should I follow this time? hehehe.

Thank God for the good health for all these years. I was diagnosed with low blood pressure last week. I also don’t believe it too. I never had any health problems before. When I came back to work yesterday, everybody was asking how was I doing. It was tiring to know how they couldn’t believe their ears when they heard about my ailing and I had to explain over and over again about my health problem. At times I felt like I should’ve run an advertisement in the newspaper to tell them about my health conditions hahahaha. It would have saved the times in doing the explanations.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Bulan Julai Bulan Membaca

Here we are coming to end, which is also a beginning
All the smiles, tears, adrenaline, sweat, and broken hearts
Through the dances, clubs, sports, parties, and friendships
No one knows what each of us has gone through to be here
I can look around at everyone and wonder what they will be
Some may never remember their teachers, you, or even me
All the weight of world is now pressed upon our shoulders
Fighting the good fight to make something of ourselves
Four years of work to start all over again with a new fear
Not showing ourselves, not to shed a single tear
Where one door closes another opens, be we must walk through
Though nothing is what it seems, everyone wearing a mask
Afraid to open up for fear of being hurt, for fear of change
We will never know unless we make our fate and
Meet our destiny with all we have taken from this place
Sharing our love and friendship with new friends
Though never to replace our high school companions
How can we ever forget the memories we made in this chapter
The dark days coming into light, the days we did not want to wake up
The mornings after we let it loose, having to get up and make it through
I cannot see what lies ahead, but I know some things must stay unsaid
I will say I love every friend that I have made here at North Gwinnett
Thank you, you have no idea what you have done for me.
A.J. Henderson
What’s happening?

I’m on my second day of MC. I thought it might be a good day to rest. But no it’s not. My stomach is still cramping and I’m still losing my appetite. I tried to eat the porridge and thank god I didn’t throw out this time around. How I wish I was at home and mom will definitely prepare me a hell lot of good meals.

A few people were not convinced that I am having a low blood pressure. Reasons:
1) I could still be online
2) I could still update my blog
3) I could still answer calls and reply their smses

I don’t like to lie around whenever I get sick. It would make me feel so helpless and tired from doing nothing even days after I get better. So that’s why I keep my time occupied by doing all these things. So please understand me.

How’s work?

I failed my last assessment. Somebody sent me an sms and congratulate me on my failure. How thoughtful he is. The trainer came out with lots of reasons but there was one that he didn’t realize, I am not so keen to do this job. Alas, I need to do the test again after my MC. Others have taken their tests for the past 2 days. That would leave me alone to do the test.

I know for sure that there would come a day when I would throw up after a day’s work. You just don’t have any ideas on how terrible it is to answer the calls from all the customers. This might sounds offensive but some of the callers can be so vain and thought that I could really understand what they are talking about in their accents. A few of them can be so annoying and you wish that they’d turn deaf right after you end up their calls. A very good example is per below:

Caller : Cik, ambo nok check baki no tepon nie.. 01X-7575 XXX
Miss,I would like to check the balance for this no 01X-7575 XXX

Me : Saya ulang nombor tersebut ya En XXXX. 01X-757 7XXX
Mr XXXX, let me repeat the no again 01X-757 7XXX

Caller : Salah tu. 01X-7575 XXX
That was wrong 01X-7575 XXX

Me : Saya ulang sekali lagi ya Encik XXXX. 01X-757 7XXX
I repeat the no again Mr XXXX 01X-757 7XXX

Caller : Gapo nigh. Salah! 01X-7575 XXX
What’s this? Wrong! 01X-7575 XXX

Me : Baiklah! En XXXX 01X-7575 XXX
All right! Mr XXX 01X-7575 XXX

Need I tell more? LOL


I went back for a short visit last week. This time it was different and happier I would say. The three of us had reunited. For the hundredth time. Gebob, Kojeh and I went out together just like the old time. I suppose mom might shed some tears when we were out. We had so much fun together and all the grudges were forgotten that day. I pray that this will last.

My nephews and nieces were doing great. Apart from learning the fact that I had forgotten about Angah’s birthday and it turned out really ugly, I had so much fun spending my time with them.

I want a rich husband so I can shop everyday

I thank God for I still have my hearing ability even after I had to endure this type of chat for weeks. At times, I feel like I was at the Sarong Party Girls outings. For me, it would be annoying to having to listen to this type of craps while having my meal. It might sounds as if I’m an anti-social but sometimes I rather have my meal alone just to hinder myself from hearing so much craps. I should blame a few particular people who taught me that silent is golden when you can’t have a good chat about books, movies, sports or current issues for now I can’t seem to be able to tolerate this type of chat hahaha.

Other examples:

1) She thought that she’s so pretty. But look at her. The shirt that she wears must be bought from PS. I reckon she had never step into ASEANA in her entire life!
Quoted from a girl that just went to ASEANA and her bf just bought her a pareo for RM60.

2) I just can’t wait for Eric to get his pay. He promised to take me to KLCC and shop there. My other bf, which is a doctor, bought me a new skirt from RedRumMurder.
Quoted from a girl who has 3 boyfriends so far and counting.

It would be interesting to know what it feels like for them when they learn that life is not always a walk in the garden.

Do they hear you when you cry?

This is the book that I’ve been reading lately. Credit to Nazrul who lent me this book. It shall fall into the must read category. It not only reminds you of your values on life but also at the end of the day you’d feel so grateful for having all those people that you love, the job that you enjoy and lots of books to read (for me that is hehehe).

All That is Gold Does Not Glitter

All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
JRR Tolkien

Monday, July 04, 2005

Don’t be fooled. I still have to go to work, in 10 minutes. I haven’t showered, but here I am. In front of the pc updating my blog. I still don’t recover from my anger angst yesterday. It would be the worst day of my life. Still, I hang on. What to do, live must go on. I shall write more when i get back from my tiresome work.
In the mean time, have a lovely day!

Let Me Not Forget

If it is not my portion to meet thee in this life
then let me ever feel that I have missed thy sight ---
let me not forget for a moment,
let me carry the pangs of this sorrow in my dreams
and in my wakeful hours.
As my days pass in the crowded market of this world
and my hands grow full with the daily profits,
let me ever feel that I have gained nothing ---
let me not forget for a moment,
let me carry the pangs of this sorrow in my dreams and in my wakeful hours.
When I sit by the roadside, tired and panting,
when I spread my bed low in the dust,
let me ever feel that the long journey is still before me ---
let me not forget a moment,
let me carry the pangs of this sorrow in my dreams
and in my wakeful hours.
When my rooms have been decked out and the flutes sound
and the laughter there is loud,
let me ever feel that I have not invited thee to my house ---
let me not forget for a moment,
let me carry the pangs of this sorrow in my dreams
and in my wakeful hours
Rabindranath Tagore